Friday, August 10, 2007

Paris Hilton Visits Jutland
(& other 5-star beaver stories)

Had my head buried in Paris Hilton's box..
uhh, sandbox..
I mean the sand for some time. Jeezus, whaz it been? Six months? A year? How long's it take for an old life to die, and yer best friend with it?

Moved to Oakland, CA and bought a sailboat. Lived on it awhile, traded my old BMW for some of the equity, then bought another one. Now I have two. Figger I'll collect a dozen or so, tie em all off on a mooring in the Oakland estuary right 'round where Jack London sat drinkin' and crafting the tales that made him the first millionaire writer in the new America, then sell em all in trade for "Jeliza-Rose," she who will take me across the Pacific, the boat as yet to be named for novelist Mitch Cullen's character expertly portrayed by Jodelle Ferland (pictured above) in Terry Gilliam's latest film. She'll be something in the forty foot range, something capable of taking me and a crew of two across blue water to Thailand, Singapore, Australia, Jutland, who knows.

For now, as a test of whether or not anyone monitors this site
anymore, two things:

One, give me yer thoughts on the new Terry Gilliam film "Tideland" via my spam-invincible email address or.. ya know, the
other one, the one I only give out to family and friends and readers
who've proven their fealty to Lord Duke, Inc.

And two, here's a bizzaro offer I stumbled upon that's sure to
stimulate some response from ya'll by a truly bold and curvaceous
anti-space alien theorist way out there in the Earthmos.

Read up. And write on.

Gott Verdammt!

photo: I will always love you, Stormy Turner
For more shots of Stormy, go here:

By the way, Paris, I saw your videos and they are, well, lame. I mean, don't get me wrong, I can TOTALLY relate to your exhibitionist tendencies and well, if I had tits and a twat, I'd wanna be you. But I ain't you. I don't have tits or a twat, but I'm ONE HELLUVA EXHIBITIONIST! Damn, girl, at least get some better videographer boyfriends. I got this friend Harrod Blank, (he calls me Cindy, like Cindy Crawford, cuz he KNOWS I Looooove The Camera) who is a real sweetheart & stand-up guy and who would DO YOU RIGHT, HONEY CHILD! Well, until we talk again, you know, the offer's open. - RSM